Definitely Not Over You
by Hookedonapirate
Summary: The one where Emma is in love with her best friend and leaves a drunken message on his phone, claiming she's over him. (She's not over him.) Based off of an episode of Friends - The one where Ross find out. Rated Teen and Up for cursing, drinking and Captain Swan bed sharing in their underwear (not necessarily in that order).


"What's your biggest secret?"

That's certainly the question of the evening. Why did Emma agree to a girl's night out again? And why does a girl's night out with her friends always have to involve revealing and exploiting secrets?

Not that it matters because Emma is so drunk right now, she could give two flying fucks about the consequences or the fact that she let her friends talk her into this when they found out her best friend would be out of the country for a week.

 _"Come on, Emma, it'll be fun!" they'd said._

And she knows what they're trying to do. They're trying to get her to talk, but she won't do it. It may be one of her biggest secrets (or maybe her biggest, come to think of it) but she won't go down that road. Nope. So, with another shot, the alcohol burns as it slides down her throat, and she slams the drink down on the table. "I'm a virgin."

Biggest mistake she's ever made because her friends are now on a mission to rectify the situation. Correction, _second_ biggest mistake. The first biggest?

Well, the first biggest mistake of the night, scratch that _,_ _life,_ began when Ruby decided it was a brilliant idea to call her best friend.

"What the hell are you doing?" Emma mumbles as she reaches out to grab her phone from Ruby's hands, but she is too clumsy and isn't nearly as quick enough, so Ruby is easily able to pull it away as dial his number.

"I told you, we're getting you laid."

"How is calling Killian going to get me laid?" Emma asks through her drunken haze, her heart flitting in panic.

"You are going to confess your feelings to your best friend, that's how." Ruby has an evil grin on her red lips as the phone starts ringing on the other end.

Emma's eyes circle around the table, looking for support, but Mary Margaret, Elsa and Regina all seem to all agree with Ruby.

"I am _not_ in love with him," Emma scoffs, feeling woozy from all the alcohol. Also the loud music booming in her ear doesn't help matters at all. "I'm _sooooo_ over him."

Ruby isn't buying it one bit. "Okay, why don't you tell him that?" she challenges, finally handing her the phone, her smile never dimming. "If you're really _over_ him as you say, then you need some closure."

Emma is as pale as a ghost as she eyes the phone which is still ringing on the other line. She accepts the device and holds it to her ear as the call goes to Killian's voicemail. "I'll show you closure," she accepts her friend's challenge, waiting for the beep as she tries to keep her hand from swaying away from her ear.

Her friends watch, amused and unwilling to accept that Emma will go through with it, but she is determined to prove them wrong. She hears the beep, and the alcohol in her system is giving her the courage to say what she has to say.

"Killian," she mumbles into the phone. "It's Emma. I just wanted you to know that I'm no longer waiting for you. I've saved myself all these years, but it was all for nothing. _Nothing,"_ she repeats, enunciating the word. "So, I'm going to get laid tonight. I'm going to meet a guy and have lots of sex because I am over you. That'srightKillianJones," she says quickly, slurring her words together. Pointing in the air at no one in particular, she speaks more slowly this time. "I… am over… you. And that, my friend, is what they call _closure."_

With that, Emma hangs up the phone and tosses it on the table, attempting a smug grin, but failing miserably. Nonetheless, she feels a sense of pride knowing she finally has some closure with her feelings for Killian. Although, it's difficult to have closure on something that's only ever been an idea, as she's never actually been with him.

Emma has been pining over her best friend since… well since high school. He was the one person who'd always seen her when she was invisible to everyone else. He and David were and still are best buddies, and that's how they'd become close. Killian would come over to her house all the time, and when Emma was bullied at school, he stood up for her. He'd gotten detention because of it, and to this day does not regret it. But when Killian got accepted into a university that was on the other side of the country, Emma knew she had to let him go.

They'd talked over the phone, sure, but since she'd seen him off at the airport, she'd felt the burden of having a big hole in her heart from not having him by her side. But it was better that way. He is two years older than her, and at the time, she knew he wouldn't want some junior in high school when he could have any college girl he wanted.

After she'd graduated, she went to off college. And now, she and Killian are roommates and best friends, and she is completely okay with that. Or at least that's what she's been telling herself this entire time.

"We need more shots," Emma mumbles, seeing all the empty glasses on the table. If she's going to get laid tonight she's going to need more liquid courage. Emma stands up far too quickly than intended, the room starts to spin around and she starts to stumble. She feels completely nauseous, and come to think of it, the thought of more alcohol makes her want to vomit.

Which she does. Thankfully, she makes it into the ladies room just in time.

Needless to say, she doesn't lose her virginity that night.

* * *

Killian arrives home from the airport after a long, dreary flight and is happy to be home again from his business trip. Wheeling his suitcase along the floor, he drags his hand over his face, making his way to his bedroom. But first he has to check on his roommate. Quietly cracking the door open, he sees her sound asleep in bed, and a smile graces his lips. He still remembers the time when they had been reunited four years ago over Christmas break.

 _It's past midnight when Killian looks at the alarm clock on the nightstand. He's been tossing and turning, trying to sleep, but he's too excited to finally see his best friend again. He'd returned to his hometown to visit David and Emma, and had arrived before she had._

 _"You can stay in Emma's room tonight," David had offered. "She won't be home until tomorrow."_

 _So, Killian had reluctantly accepted. He knew the feelings he held for her would rekindle once he saw her. But David had went on to tell him she'd made many friends and really enjoyed college life, so Killian knew he had to forget about any romantic feelings he still held for her. He didn't want to ruin her college experience with a long distance relationship._

 _Turning on his side, he sighs deeply, closing his eyes and trying once again to fall asleep._

 _He wakes up to a crash and a curse._

 _"Fuck! David, why is your suitcase in my room?!"_

 _Killian's groggy, trying to open his sleepy eyes. He's still on his side, facing away from the door half asleep and it's still dark as he hears her voice._

 _It's Emma._

 _His heart slams in his chest, and he's not sure what to do. Before he can even react though, he feels the bed dip and Emma's body crashing into his as she tries to lay down._

 _And that's when she screams._

 _Emma jumps out of bed in panic and turns on the lamp, blinding Killian as he rolls over to face her, raising an arm to shield his eyes from the intrusive light._

 _"What the hell?!" she cries, but when her gaze lands on him, her mouth falls open and the fear in her eyes turns into something else entirely. "Killian?"_

 _Taking in her appearance, shock washes over him._

 _The last time he'd seen her was when she was a sophomore in high school. She was a tomboy who wore jeans and t-shirts and she was always sporting a baseball cap, her hair was always in a ponytail and she wore dorky glasses, which he's always found to be adorable. But he could never tease her about it, because he too used to wear dorky, thick framed glasses._

 _But now?_

 _Now, Emma stands before him in a snug pink tank top and matching panties he can clearly see, along with her full, perfectly round breasts and pebbled nipples poking out through the thin fabric of her shirt. Her long, golden hair is cascading over her shoulders, and the bone structure of her face is more prominent and sculpted, the apple of her cheeks a rosey shade of red and her eyes are much greener than he'd remembered._

 _Killian gulps thickly as he gapes at her. She was always cute to him but now… now she is incredibly hot._

 _"Emma…" he breathes, managing a weak smile._

 _As her eyes roam his body, which is bare, apart from his boxer briefs, his chest now sprinkled with dark hair, she seems to appreciate how much he's grown as much as he appreciates how much of a woman she's clearly become._

 _"Is everything alright in here?" David's raspy voice fills the room as he enters, sleepy eyes full of panic and confusion._

 _Emma nods, her eyes locked with Killian's. "Yeah, my classes were done with earlier than expected. I was hoping to sleep in my own bed tonight, but it seems someone has already taken it," she teases playfully._

 _"Sorry, sis," David apologizes, but appears to be a bit annoyed he was woken up for this as he glances at him. "Killian, I guess you'll have to sleep on the couch then. Emma can get you some blankets, I'm going back to bed," he grumbles and disappears from the room._

 _Emma is still staring at Killian, a big smile blooming over her lips once her brother is gone. Killian is expecting to get up, leave and head for the sofa, but before he knows it, Emma is giggling and tackling Killian into the mattress. A groan flies from his lips at the impact as she draws him into a hug, laying on top of him._

 _"God, I've missed you," she whispers in his ear._

 _As Killian wraps his arms around her, feeling her warm body pressed against his, he has to restrain himself from kissing her, or allowing his body to react to hers._

 _"I've missed you too, love," he breathes in her hair and cradles the back of her head with his hand. His heart is racing sporadically in his chest as he breathes her in and takes in the fragrance of her fruity shampoo. She feels so good in his arms, he doesn't ever want to let her go again._

 _"You're hairier than I remember," Emma laughs, lifting her head and gazing down at him. "You have a beard and chest hair," she points out, which isn't exactly fair because it's not like he can point out a couple of her... changes._

 _Killian blushes profusely as she combs her fingers through his scruff and chest hair. "Aye, the baby face wasn't doing it for me anymore," he chuckles. "And what can I say, the chest hair has kind of grown on me," he quips._

 _He's not sure if he should leave and let her rest or not, but she doesn't seem off put whatsoever by his presence. In fact her eyes are dancing with intrigue as she gazes at him like she's trying drill a hole in his head._

 _"Do you still wear glasses?" she asks curiously as she rolls onto her side and lays her head on the pillow, pulling her sheet and comforter over them._

 _So, it looks like they're just sharing the bed for the night, then._

 _He shakes his head and follows suit, laying on his side and resting his head on the same pillow, their faces only inches away from one another. "I wear contacts, now. And you?"_

 _"Same," she replies with a grin. "I'm not the same girl you once knew, Killian."_

 _"And I'm not the same boy, Swan," he assures her, stroking her hair._

 _"You're definitely not a boy," she points out, running her hand down his jaw, her thumb brushing the prickly stubble._

 _"And you're definitely not a girl, Emma," he reminds her, a smirk pulling at the corner of his lips._

 _Emma's cheeks flush with a beautiful shade of rosy pink and she giggles, the nervous tension between then dwindling._

 _They end up talking all night in bed, falling asleep just past dawn, and Killian wakes around noon with Emma sleeping soundly in his arms, breathing softly against his chest. From that point on, he knows they will be able to pick up where they had left off, and he knows it's more important than ever to not ruin what they once had. Their friendship is just too good to let it slip through his fingers again._

Killian gently closes her door with a soft click and proceeds to his bedroom, unpacking some of his things.

Emerging from the bedroom, he turns on his phone, for he had turned it off during the long flight from China. He makes his way to the kitchen to make some coffee for when Emma wakes up. He knows she had gone out with her friends last night, so he figures she'd drank too much and will by hungover when she wakes.

As the coffee's brewing, Killian's phone lights up as he turns it on, and he's surprised to see a notification for a voice message from Emma.

* * *

Emma's groaning when she opens her eyes to the harsh brightness streaming through her bedroom window. She's on her stomach as she turns her head, burying her face in the pillow beneath her.

When she finally manages to sit up, she lifts her hand to feel the headache blooming, her forehead pounding like a jackhammer against her temple. She also realizes how messy her hair is, and she can taste vomit in her mouth.

How much did she drink last night?

Emma grumbles something nonsensical under her breath and groggily stands, wiping at her eyes as she trudges to the door. She intends on going to the bathroom, to comb her hair and brush her teeth and make herself a little more presentable for when Killian comes home. But when she opens her bedroom door, she can see her handsome roommate already home in the kitchen.

Oh well, he's seen her in worse conditions. Plus, she's really in no condition to care. So, she glances down to see that she's dressed decently, wearing a tank top and pajama pants. She throws on a hoodie, pulls her hair into a messy bun and leaves the bedroom sluggishly wandering half-asleep through her apartment, passing the kitchen on her way and hoping she doesn't look like death warmed over.

"Good morning, sunshine," he greets brightly, a little too cheerful for her liking right now.

"Morning," she grumbles, still holding her head as she refrains from looking at him, not wanting to stop her determined endeavor in reaching the bathroom. She doesn't fail to notice the sound of coffee being brewed, though. Emma is looking forward to drowning in coffee to wash out the alcohol from her bloodstream.

"I take it you had fun last night? A little too much fun, perhaps?" he teases from the kitchen.

"Mmm," she groans and enters the bathroom, grabbing her toothbrush. She squeezes out some toothpaste on the brush and scrubs her teeth with it, ridding her mouth of the vile taste of vomit.

"Hey, Emma, I got a voice message from you. Sorry I haven't listened to it yet. I turned off my phone on the plane."

Emma stops brushing.

Message? What message?

She rinses her mouth and toothbrush, returning it to the toothbrush holder while trying to recall what had happened last night, but the memories are a bit blurry. She remembers alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol and drinking and tequila shots. She remembers telling everyone she was a virgin, she remembers her friends trying to get her laid.

Then a memory of a phone call Ruby had made to Killian on Emma's phone before she'd handed it over, slams into her like a freight train.

 _I'm over you, Killian Jones._

Oh fucking hell.

Emma's eyes widen, her chapped lips falling open.

She scrambles out of the bathroom and into the kitchen, but judging by the awestruck look on his face and the phone that's now spinning on the tiled floor, she's too late.

"You're over me?" he asks in bewilderment, appearing to be defeated.

She's going to kill Ruby.

"Oh god," she breathes, eyes slipping shut with mortification as she buries her face into her hands, groaning as she heads for the sofa.

This isn't happening. Nope. This is definitely not happening.

"When were you…" Killian stammers, valiantly trying to find the words, a pretty pink blush blossoming across his cheeks. "When were you... under me?"

Emma paces the main room and feels his eyes tracking her every move as she wishes the floor would open up and swallow her whole. She's not even sure what to say at this point. She's clearly busted. She can blame it on the alcohol all she wants, but it's no use. No one just drunk calls their best friend saying they're over them unless they're actually in love with them. Emma clears her throat, and wills her feet to move towards him as she peers down toying with the strings of her hoodie. "Basically, I've... had feelings for you... since high school," she mumbles and swallows thickly finally mustering the courage to lift her head and look him in the eye.

Normally she can read her best friend like an open book, but right now she's finding it difficult to figure out what he's thinking.

"Since… since high school?" he asks, nervously pacing back and forth and running his hand through his hair, trying to digest this information.

Emma nods, all of the blood draining from her face as she thinks of the possible consequences. What if he rejects her? What if knowing how she feels destroys their friendship? Or what if he feels the same way and they eventually break up and never see each other again? This is exactly why she's never told him before.

Emma suddenly can't breathe, the air in her lungs completely gone.

"And so you're what, you're over me now?" he asks, and she can see the anxiety in his features as he stops and looks at her, appearing to be deflated.

Emma shakes her head, feeling hopeless. How is she supposed to look her best friend in the eye and lie to him? She can't. They've been through too much together. "No, I'm not over you, Killian. I've tried to get over you for years, believe me, but I… I was afraid of what would happen if I told you, so I tried to convince myself I wanted closure."

"And you've saved yourself for me? But what about the dates you went on since we've lived together?"

"Everytime I went out with someone, I… I always compared them to you," Emma confesses and studies his face to gauge his reaction.

He's still in shock. "And?"

"And they weren't you." Her words are broken, her last shred of dignity gone. Killian knows now. It's over and so is their friendship, she's sure of it.

Killian doesn't speak for what seems to be an eternity as he stares at her, trying to process everything.

Oh god, the silence is killing her, torturing her to no end. Emma wishes she could just crawl into a hole and die.

Finally, _finally,_ as he scratches behind his red tipped ear, he draws in a deep, wobbly breath before speaking. "So let me get this straight… we live together, we share everything with each other…"

Emma looks down in shame. Oh here it comes. She's so screwed.

"Occasionally we sleep in the same bed, we've both saved ourselves for one another, we're both in love with each other and yet here we are, best friends and nothing more?"

 _Huh?!_

Emma's head snaps up, eyes connecting with his stormy blue ones. "You… you're in…" she fumbles for words, not believing what he'd said. "You're in love with me?"

He nods. "Aye. I've been since high school too, I was just… like you, I was afraid."

A silence washes over them, but it's not the same as before when it felt like she couldn't breathe. There's a calmness, now that their feelings are out their in the open, and yet the air around them crackles with anticipation for what's next. They might understand each other now, but they're still on the precipice of something greater, something more, if both are brave enough to take the next step.

"So, last night did you really… did you end up…" his words trail off, but Emma knows exactly what he wants to ask her.

"No, I didn't. Even if I'd wanted to, I was far too drunk," she says with a small laugh. "I vomited in the restroom and then Ruby and Mary Margaret took me home.

Killian sighs in relief. "So… you really haven't been with anyone?"

"So what? You haven't either," she reminds him.

"Well, I was waiting for the right person," he admits, a small smirk cracking his lips, "but it turns out that person has been in front of my face this entire time."

"Oh really, and who would that be?" Emma teases, placing her hands on her hips.

Killian's lips quirk up into a grin as he takes a step forward. "Well, I'll give you a hint. She has blonde hair and the most beautiful emerald eyes I've ever seen. She's feisty and funny and smart and doesn't take shit from anyone."

Emma laughs, and his features grow serious as he continues on, slowly making his way over to her.

"She knows me like no one else does, she offers a really good shoulder to cry on and she's always there for me when I need her." Now he is smiling again. "And she leaves adorable drunken voice messages on my phone."

Emma blushes and smiles, playfully punching his shoulder.

"Oi," he utters, pretending to be in pain as he rubs his shoulder. "And she packs quite the punch."

"Shut up."

Before he can come up with a witty response, her hand is sliding up his neck, fingers tangling into his silky hair, and tugging him down so his lips slant against hers. And Emma can't believe she's actually kissing her best friend.

Emma is kissing Killian Jones.

The sparks fly between them as they angle their heads, noses brushing together as they get swept up in a mind boggling kiss. It feels so surreal.

Heat spreads deliciously between them, she sees stars and feels like she's floating as she clings onto him, pulling him closer. If she weren't holding onto him for dear life, she'd probably be stumbling backwards. A groan tears from his throat and she eagerly swallows it down as he wraps his arms around her, his fingers slipping beneath her hoodie. His hands curl around her hips, and Emma easily decides that kissing Killian Jones, her roommate and best friend, is so much better than she'd ever imagined.

His hands wander up and down her back, igniting more sparks throughout her body, all the way down to her toes with every caress. He touches her everywhere, like he can't get enough of her skin now that he has her in his clutches.

As they pour all of the pent up desires and feelings for each other into that kiss, she marvels at how strong he is and how good he tastes as her tongue sweeps across his. Emma presses up against him, leaving no space between them, letting herself get caught up in all that he offers. Emma moans as he sucks on her tongue, and when he releases it, she bites on his bottom lip, eliciting a low growl which sends arousal surging to her core.

From head to toe they're consumed in one another; she can feel his heartbeat against hers, feel his chest constrict with every breath he takes. They're both perfectly in sync with each other, like they always are, and she just wants to get lost in him until nothing remains but them right here, in this moment.

When their lungs are in need of oxygen, their lips break away but not their bodies as they desperately come up for air. They're both utterly wrecked, and Emma enjoys how destroyed her best friend looks, with his flushed cheeks, lips swollen and his eyes dilated, showing only a thin rim of a sparkling blue.

He looks at her in wonderment as he rests his forehead on hers and keeps her securely in his arms, his eyes trained on her lips. Emma's skin feels alight and she has to wait for the room to stop spinning around her as she clutches onto him, trying to stay grounded.

"That was…" she whispers breathlessly.

"About bloody time," he finishes with a cheeky smirk.

Emma nods in agreement and they both take a moment to compose themselves, still gripping onto on another like their life depends on it.

"So… what now?" he asks, eyes glinting with hope as he looks up, refocusing his gaze on hers.

A sly grin curves her lips. "Well, now that it's official we're both hopelessly saving ourselves for each other, maybe it's time for us to... use each other up?" she offers, hoping he won't be too much of a gentleman to take her up on her offer. They've been longing for one another far too long to wait.

"As you wish," he answers with a growl, to her utter relief.

The next thing she knows, her feet are being lifted off the ground, legs wrapped around his waist as he's ushering them quickly towards her bedroom.

Who knew telling her best friend she was over him would turn out to be the best mistake she's ever made? She's definitely _not_ over him, but it's looking like she'll be spending a lot of time under him.


End file.
